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I shouted - "Where you off to Charlie?"He said, "I'm off to change a light bulb."Well I just cracked up, couldn't stop laughing, then said,"That's gonna be a bit awkward init?" Not really." he said. "I still have the receipt, you insensitive bastard."I've accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles.My next crap could spell disaster.Went out last night and got really wasted.I woke up this morning next to a fat old bird who was snoring and farting ... so, at least I got home OK.The wife's back on the warpath again.She was up for making a home video last night and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.Angela Merkel arrives at Passport Control in Athens airport."Nationality?" asks the immigration officer."German," she replies."Occupation?"No, just here for a few days."As the coffin was being lowered into the ground at a Parking Officer's funeral, a voice from inside screams:"I'm not dead, I'm not dead. Let me out!"The Vicar smiles, leans forward, sucking air through. My daughter is the hottest one.How else do you describe two women - one who gets her own husband to screw their daughter and the other who lets him? I am Dipak Dorba, and I happen to be thirty-nine years old. My wife, Shanti, is an even thirty-eight, and we have a very lovely daughter Neha who is twenty. Like me, my daughter got married at the age of nineteen, but unlike mine, hers wasn't a love marriage. Besides, my early marriage to Shanti can be attributed to her pregnancy, but Neha's early marriage didn't have that kind of excuse too.So I guess it is no surprise that barely a couple of years after they got married, Neha packed her suitcase and returned home from the States. Let me defend the arranged marriage system at this point - I have known thousands of other couples who fell in love after their marriage. It just wasn't meant for my daughter though, and the fact that my son-in-law was a practising gay hastened their divorce. Oh, well, other parents must have thought, back to.
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